5 lessons from September

September felt like one freaking long mirror to me.

Some days it showed me a face I liked, other days it reminded me of everything I was still figuring out.

But if there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that months leave us with breadcrumbs of learning. Little lessons tucked into conversations, failures, bursts of joy, and even the dull in-betweens.

Here are the five I’m carrying forward from this month:

1. Nostalgia is really an identity gap. I’ve talked about this before, how missing people or places is rarely about them. You might really love and care for them but nostalgia is about missing the version of you that existed back then. Once you see that, the ache turns into information. It tells you what parts of yourself you want to revive now.

2. Slowing down isn’t laziness, it’s strategy. I used to think rushing meant progress. But this month reminded me that hustling feeds the ego, while slowing down builds character. (Also, naps? They’re basically soul software updates. Highly recommend haha.)

3. Clarity comes through writing, not thinking. Every time I’ve tried to think my way out of confusion, I’ve ended up in a bigger knot. But when I sit down to write even messy, ugly drafts, the threads start untangling by themselves. Not kidding. Writing doesn’t just record clarity, it creates it.

4. ‘Should haves’ don’t move the story forward. We all do it: I should have applied, I should have said that, I should have stayed quiet. But I realised every “should have” is really just a dead-end street. The better question is, what now? That’s where new doors open.

5. Relationships are built on presence, not performance. Sometimes I catch myself trying too hard to be interesting, to be liked, to say the “right” thing. September showed me (again) that the best connections happen when I drop the performance and just show up. Flawed, curious, fully present.

September was both gentle and sharp with me. A reminder that months aren’t just pages on a calendar. They’re tiny chapters where we test our resilience, learn our patterns, and rehearse the kind of life we want to live.

So here’s to October: may it bring softer mirrors, fewer “should haves,” and more days where slowing down feels like winning.