Pressing reset

All of us need resets in life, often after big projects end.

No, big projects don’t necessarily mean work contracts. It ranges from losing jobs and pivoting careers to breakups and divorces - with people and sometimes, also with habits.

No matter what the situation was, I used to think resetting was easy like getting haircuts while saying “I need a change”, changing DPs to ‘turn over new leaves’, or simply declaring to my journal that I was gonna wake up as a new person tomorrow.

Naturally, none of that worked. I woke up feeling better for a minute only to slide back into older patterns, again, and again, and again.

And frankly, it was not a good feeling.

Irrespective of how you try to trick your brain into believing you’re a new person, you are not. Pranoti will always be Pranoti, Sarah will always be Sarah. And you, my reader, will always be yourself. It’s not a commodity to be disowned.

Let me ask you one thing - have you ever watched a TV show where you eventually started loving the character you hated in the first season? If I ask you why I’m sure the answer would be ‘character arc’.

Yes, so we all have our arcs.

Your approach towards life is not your entire identity. As your approach changes, your identity evolves. And most of it is in your hands.

Think about it this way - different phases of your life are not different books, they are the chapters of the same book. You are and will always be the same person.

How you approach life determines a part of your identity, so yes, becoming someone you are proud of is in your control.

Just that, if you want to press reset, some tough love is unnecessary. Be a parent to yourself, be strict with yourself when need be because you know it’s going to be okay in the long run. You will end up thanking yourself.

And no, you don’t need new haircuts, colours, DPs, tattoos, moving cities, leaving homes, or any impulsive actions to achieve that.

Focus on what matters and look inward.

If grass can grow from tiny gaps in the concrete pavement, I’d like to think anything is possible.